Still going

Still going more or less strongly. Survived a stressful Monday taking Christine to a therapist for the first time, but it went very well. Solidly dreading going to therapy with Lisa on Tuesday. But I have to admit even the thought of therapy has been beneficial. I've been thinking about why I'm so scared of it. Boundary problems mostly. But this morning I woke up feeling really angry with her--it's all purely imaginary--I think she's angry with me about what I think is a perfectly friendly update kind of email, but she hasn't answered which makes me nervous that I've offended her. Like I said, all in my head. But the useful thing about feeling mad this morning was that I began to realize that it's OKAY to be mad at her. Even though I carry a lot of guilt about her, I'm doing my best to make it right now. I can't change the past--and there's even a ghost of a chance that maybe I wasn't as horrible as I thought. So YES, I have the right to feel angry with her.

Happily, real distress causes me to want to eat less, not more. I'm lucky that way. I think boredom and celebration and task avoidance are the things that most make me want to chow down. Here's what I've been eating this week.

Tomato Day
Breakfast an omelete with tomatoes and a little feta
Snack: 12  grape tomatoes
Lunch: black bean salad--1/2 c black beans, a little feta, tomatoes with olive oil and balsamic vinegar. with 1/2 WW pita.
Snack: A baby brie cheese (70 cal) and some corn chips.
Dinner: WW spaghetti with spaghetti sauce. Cabbage salad with a few olives, I slice Ezekiel bread.
Dessert: pears and blueberries.

Vegetarian Day Yesterday
Blew the vegetarian part of it.

Breakfast: 2 slices Ezekiel bread with peanut butter, chocolate milk, honey crisp apple cider
Lunch: Chicken tava (It was Major Fest Day and Margarita brought lunch), white pita bread, big cookie. random chocolates.
Snack--an hour later: a largish piece of cheese and the rest of the chicken in a biscuit crackers (about 10)
Dinner: Fancy french bread with cream cheese, eggs, 2 sausage links, milk
Dessert: a few chocolates

Today---Hungry Girl 4.6
Breakfast--big bowl of blueberry almond oatmeal. Milk
Snack--100 cal popcorn
Lunch--tofu stir fry---surprisingly good, a few of Shandel's crackers. A 30 cal wedge of trader joes salted carmel chocolate
Snack: a mini brie and 6 almonds
Dinner: HG chicken strips--basically chicken "breaded" with fiber one cereal. Probably a salad and/or potato.
Dessert: don't know yet. Fruit would best. I'll have to see what kind of self discipline I have.

Exercise--not happening much, but I will take a walk after work.